Does capitalism always have to be so... gaudy?     


Welcome to the 22 May - 09 Jun archive of Stream - you can click the planet to the left to get back to Jimbo's World if you're lost.

   STREAM OF urine
   This is the part of the site where I don't have to screw about with formatting, or layouts, or anything else.  I just bang on the keyboard like a diseased monkey, and *poof* - instant content!  Guess what part of the site's most likely to get updated on a regular basis?  Right.   
09 Jun 2000
12:13 Another addition to the linkbar
Check out, home to some truly excellent (if, unfortunately, truly infrequent) writing.  Check it out when you've got some time to get enthralled with copious archives.  Main attractions:  Ask Satan, and Driver Down (linked as drunkdriver on the main page).  Ask Satan is just what it sounds like - an extremely entertaining question-and-answer column.  Driver Down is a bit more difficult to classify... it's a collection of longish essays full of long-haired Bohemian counterculture.  If you're just looking for pony-fucks-midget pr0n for your "shock value", don't bother... but if you're in the mood for some seriously intelligent commentary from an unusual perspective (and I really hope that a goodly chunk of my regular readers are), you'll love Driver Down.
r-arrow.gif (898 bytes)  E/N community backbiting sidebar: real intellectual subversives don't need to whine about how "everybody in my community isn't really subversive like me" to get their point across.  Go read the latest Driver Down, titled "The Boy Scout And The Bull" if you want to see what a genuine iconoclast looks like.


08:26 Soapbox time: Instant Messaging Protocols
If you're a regular reader, you already know how much I hate proprietary crap... and you can skip the next paragraph, because it's where I'm going to describe the difference between proprietary and open standards.

An open standard is one in which programs from different vendors which do the same task - like email, for example - may all be different, but they all adhere to the same protocol.  Using the example I mentioned above - email - you know that you can send and receive email to any system, from any system.  People using hotmail can send/receive to/from people using Outlook Express or Eudora, etc, etc.  This is a very good thing.  How useful would email be if you could only use it to communicate with people using the same ISP and the same client?  Not very.

Well, AOL is attempting to sabotage the formation of a unified standard for instant messaging protocols, so that they can keep things as they stand now - the ICQ service, which AOL bought, is sucking hardcore for lack of server resources.  This leaves the only real competitor for AOL's IM to be the Yahoo Messenger... and it's not a whole lot of competition.

But why does AOL want to keep a monopoly on a free service, you ask?  Because, like everything AOL does, it's not truly free.  AOL's Instant Messenger client bombards you with advertising - and if an accepted standard for instant messaging were to evolve out of the current conference which is supposed to do precisely that, AOL would lose a lot of banner impressions.  That's why AOL has deliberately blocked MSN's Messenger client from interoperability with their own IM network - regardless of the fact that it would be good for their customers, AOL worries that if people have the choice, they will choose a truly free client that does not bombard the user with AOL's advertising.  And AOL wants you to look at the ads like a good little consumer.

I mean, come on folks - hasn't anybody noticed that even though AOL provides poorer service and poorer technical support than any other major ISP, and charges more per month for access than any other ISP, they still bombard their hapless users with advertisements throughout the course of their use of the service?  The entire reason that AOL uses a proprietary browser and a proprietary email client is that they don't want you to be able to avoid their constant gaudy advertisement.  No, it's not enough that they charge more for poorer service: they want ad revenue, too.


So here's your chance to Fight The Man™: go to to sign the petition for AOL to open up their Instant Messaging standard...  I did.



03:48 New Theatre For The Jaded, broken banners
Hmmm.  Bla-Bla changed the damn banner code on me, and now it doesn't seem to work... hopefully, they just don't quite have the new service up and running yet, and when I get up in the morning it will all be automagically working.  I hope.  (Yup... everything's good now.   Whew!)

As for Theatre For The Jaded - this is quite possibly the mildest Theatre for the Jaded I've ever run... but it's pretty damn entertaining nonetheless, in a sophomoric fart humor sort of way. (mpeg, 248k)


07 Jun 2000
18:42 New addition to the linkbar, Saddam Hussein propaganda wackiness
We've got a new addition to the linkbar today - Chimptopia.  E/N with a brain fuckin' rules.   Props to the Mighty Mighty PenIs for linkin' em first!

And in unrelated news, check out Saddam's wack-ass "music video" propaganda that he pimps out on Iraqi TV every single night.  Man, this was a good thing - I've gotten so depressed lately about how corrupt our own government is, and just how low an IQ it panders its propaganda to (successfully!) that it's one hell of a great big Ex-Lax relief to see that, no matter how bad it is here... it's still considerably better here than it is in a lot of the world.  Props to Stile for this one... and Stile, man, that "100% Pure Evil" video you went on and on about in your newsletter was nowhere near as bad as the shit torture one.  That shit torture one disturbed me... bad.


06 Jun 2000
17:36 X-Men fan?  This is pretty amusing
   Check out this fake "Wolverine's Theme" song by an equally fake (but surprisingly good at it) Jewel. 

Btw, I found this over at   If you don't remember, they're the guys who showed up on everybody's radar when they opened with those old pseudo-WWII era posters about MP3 piracy and surfing at work... and promptly dropped right the fuck back off most everybody's radar immediately afterwards.  They're getting kinda corporate over there now, but there's still a lot of talent... it's worth the occasional read.


00:40 Theatre for the Jaded: Lesbian Stumpfuckers Anonymous
No, I'm not kidding.  Click here to watch... you pervert. (5.4MB, .mpg)

Oh yeah, and by the way, mp3 of the week changed - it's now MC 900 Ft Jesus - If I Only Had A Brain... oldskool goodness, and the bassline kicks serious ass.


05 Jun 2000
22:29 I knew somebody was having a bad day when I posted that dart pic
And as it turns out, it was my friend Kathy... she and King Louis XIV and I (no, really!) were sitting around in the living room at about 4:20 this weekend, commenting on how brutal the storm outside was. Meanwhile, the power kept fucking blinking on and off, cycling my amp and eliciting cataclysmic thumps from the speakers that rivalled the actual thunder.  But that's beside the point.  I got an email from Kathy today, chekkit:
You know what's pretty fucking amusing?

Commenting on the brutality of lightening while watching its storm rage apocalyptically outdoors, then arriving home to flames where said lightening struck, through the wall of your house, the top of a mountain on a model train table. 

That's Alanis Morisette song-fodder right there, yo!

OK, on the one hand, it's definitely not cool that lightning struck Kathy's house.

But on the other hand... welllll... how cool is that?


22:25 What the fuck is this chick deep-throating...?
First one to post the correct answer (and no, I don't know either) to the guestbook gets the coveted no-prize... and some really strange looks from the rest of us.

Seriously... anybody know wtf that is?  Anybody?  If you do, please - enlighten the rest of us.



22:11 Simply horrifying...!  
This is one of, if not the most viscerally horrifying still images I've ever seen.  All I can say is, thank god I couldn't find an mpeg... mouseover here if you dare, but I'm warning you: you will never be able to comfortably relax in a hammock again.

now for the love of god, mouseover here - and do it quick!

credit for this abomination goes to zenfnord, who posted it at the Stile Project forum.

03 Jun 2000
22:33 Portrait of a man having a bad day
   Not that I, myself am having a bad day... I'm tired as hell because I spent all day in P33T's pool and got sunburned, but I'm feelin' pretty good.

That will be all.


01 Jun 2000
23:45 What's wrong with this picture?
I think that we all, occasionally, take a quick glance at something with writing on it and see the words slightly twisted.  The results are often humorous: we look at words too briefly for our minds to quite finish translating the raw image data into symbols which can then translate into ideas it understands... so our subconscious fills in the gaps as best it can with whatever it thinks might be topical.  One of my favorite instances of this phenomenon was a billboard which said "The Truth Is Found Through Meditation", which my subconscious helpfully translated to "The Truth Is Found Through Medication."   Heh heh.

Anyway, my brain did it to me again tonight.  Difference is, I have the tools now to make my subconscious mind's pitiful efforts at translating reality into reality... of a sort.




31 May 2000
18:56 The guestbook gets more and more interesting as time goes by
entry 451 :  31 May 2000 - 14:03:48
   name:  Mrs. Bunny  posting from:  Miami Beach, FL   
homepage:  none  ip:
I think this site is ok. It's kinda dumb though cause i dont really see a point to it.
Why doesn't it surprise me that a "" would miss the point?

There is no "point" to an E/N site, o ye of rodent descent... It just is.   Y'know - kinda like AOL chat rooms.


entry 441 :  29 May 2000 - 08:23:10
   name:  David  posting from:  Newcastle (at the moment)   
homepage: Camp David ip:
My name is David and I often find myself lonely in a new town. I am an economic migrant. I perform in mens clubs as a backing singer/dancer. Therefore I meet new people all the time. Being a homosexual man in his 20s it is often difficult to strike up a meaningful relationship. Therefore I mainly meet men for sex. I recently saw a murder in a public toilet in Doncaster. I was a witness and testafied in court. I had sex with both men immediately before the murders. I found myself aroused telling the court about the events. I fee that associating sexual excitement and death together could lead me into trouble. What can I do? I feel that striking up a stable relationship with somebody could help. If you are interested please contact me. If you e-mail me at the address above or phone me at 0191 209 2903. Maybe we could go for walks and visit nightclubs. That would be nice.
Please reply.
OK, now wtf is up with that?  I don't think I even have a smartass remark up my sleeve for this one...  I considered fucking with his guestbook entry, maybe making him out to be a hetero chick and putting a hot naked pic in there but leaving the phone number the same... but on second thought, this was a bit too odd to fuck with.  I'm just gonna go ahead and leave that there in all its dubious glory, disturbed on its own right but not disturbed by me, and ask again: wtf?


18:33 More of Mom's photography
Where else but Jimbo's World would you find unretouched photography of a "Muff Doctor's" office where the doctor always needs heavy hydraulic lifts to raise the patients to into a "working" position?   


Where the movies all blow ass
inema1.jpg (24396 bytes)


26 May 2000
08:03 When fake tits attack
Mouseover here to find out why you should never patronize Butcher Bob's Bargain Basement o' Boobs if you want to go buy yourself a new pair of tits.  (Don't worry, no blood or gore or anything... just a tit-job gone horribly, horribly wrong.)

On a side note: why is it that the vast majority of women who want to get fake tits already have a pretty damn nice pair?  Fake tits are not a good thing, folks.  Getting breast implants is kinda like getting an artificial hip... you really, really don't want to do that unless there's something seriously wrong with what you've already got.


Mouseover here for 100% natural blank space.


25 May 2000
12:48 Some people have way too much time on their hands
Check this crazy shit out... racism at its very finest.  Here, lemme give you a taste:
In this scenario, the following power blocs are likely to emerge :
  • The West - also known as Saxonia, comprising the Nordic or Saxon, mainly Protestant nations of the globe,
  • Latinum - comprising the Roman Catholic populations of the world,
  • Islamestan - comprising the Islamic nations of the Middle East,
  • Slavia - comprising the Slav, mainly Eastern Orthodox nations centered on Russia,
  • East Asia - constituting the nations of East Asia centered on China,
  • Negroland - comprising the Black Nations of the world.

Whilst each of these power blocs is recognised, Negroland is often neglected and underestimated.

I think somebody needs to clue this poor sod in on the fact that none of his imaginary power blocs are "recognised"... and that "Negroland" is often neglected because it doesn't fucking exist.  Why the hell is it that so many people can seem to find nothing to base their life on other than their race?   Am I the only one astonished to see people attempt to remake an entire fucking planet just to map out their own paranoid fantasies of race warfare?

All this pitiable "movement" really is is proof positive - once again - that racism is not a "white" problem.   Racism exists in people of every complexion, goddammit... and the modern "politically correct" idea that racism is a "white" phenomenon only exacerbates the real problem.  There was a day when racism was tolerated among white people - and, predicably, white assholes everywhere got way out of hand with it, and used other races and ethnicities as scapegoats for their own inadequacies.  These days, however, racism is a "hot-button" amongst white people... and as a result, overt white racism is largely confined to the ranks of the chronically unemployed and un(der)educated.  But racism among black people is currently tolerated, and often even encouraged, by established society... and unsurprisingly, the result is that the outspokenness and general lack of connection to reality amongst overt black racists is growing by leaps and bounds.

God damn it, folks, people are people.  There are no "blacks" and "whites" - there are black people and white people and plenty of shades in between.  And there are assholes a-plenty in every possible shade of skin tone and variety of ethnicity... so for crying out loud can we just all quit encouraging any of them?



07:54 What "she got dumps like a truck" really means
So that's what Sisqo was talking about!  Kinda makes you feel sorry for that poor little S-10, doesn't it?

Thanks to Matt Romine for the pic.



Do you think they sell condoms?

kum&go.jpg (19311 bytes)

This is another of Mom's infamous "random small Midwestern town" vacation pix.
(Don't you wish your mother sent you pictures to post on your E/N site?)


Just a little "heads up" to some newer readers
*** warning: intensely grotesque image ***
I've been getting a lot of emails lately asking me to add them to my "email joke list."  C'mon, folks... what's up with that?  Mouseover here and ask yourself - is somebody who'd post something like that on his web page very fucking likely to maintain an "email joke list?"

The answer to that question, if you're still confused, would be no.

Mouseover here when you've learned your lesson.



24 May 2000
01:23 Pictures from Mom's vacation
Yes, my mom really did take this picture on vacation.  And no, she didn't make the "rest area", she just photographed it.   


22 May 2000
11:04 Kid Rock starves to death - damn Napster!
   Go check out the article at The Onion... they've really put their finger on the crux of the whole Napster vs RIAA issue.

One thing they don't mention that you may or may not know already: artists themselves rarely make jack shit off of their own CDs.  They make their money from touring, and from the T-shirts fans buy at their shows.  What, you thought that they spent their whole fucking lives on the road because they liked living out of a bus?


Unspeakably vile
I'm warning you crazy kids - this stuff is very nasty.  I wound up searching for pictures of tapeworm infestations recently (we won't go into why).  The thing is, it turns out that pathology pages aren't organized worth a shit - parasite infestations are mixed in with malignant cancers and terminal obesity and STD's, and you just sorta have to work your way through the list to see what they've got.

The long and the short of it is, while I didn't really come up with what I was looking for as regards the tapeworms, I did find some of the most vile still images I've seen in quite some time.  Hungry?  On a diet, and don't want to break it?   Then mouseover the links under the box below... and trust me, your appetite will instantly diminish.

prolapsed hemorrhoids  -  obesity (cadaver)  -  non-specific penile inflammation (cadaver)

beautiful, beautiful blank space

By the way, if you want to learn some entertainingly horrifying things about human parasite infestations, check this out.  No repulsive pictures, but believe you me, your imagination will run wild!



Click here for 15 May 2000 Stream



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